


A Brief History of Unicron's Goats

by shootertron



Series: Dairybots [3]
Category: Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Genocide, Goats, M/M, Mechpreg, Other, Shapeshifting, god/mortal, living planets, robot lactation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-08
Updated: 2017-02-08
Packaged: 2018-09-22 19:46:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9622856
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shootertron/pseuds/shootertron
Summary: A story of how Unicron came to have goatbots living in his abdomen. Set in an AU of the Armada universe.





	

Long ago, Unicron came into being. At first he was embryonic and small, knowing little of the universe. But as time went on he accumulated knowledge, like dust around forming celestial bodies. At first the knowledge instilled a sense of wonder into him. But as more and more sentient beings came into existence and his immense powers grew, Unicron was overwhelmed by the amount of suffering in the universe. This new noise in his head was unbearable.

Unable to sleep or dream peacefully, Unicron was at a loss at what to do.

That is, until he started devouring inhabited planets.

If sentient beings are dead, then they can’t suffer, he reasoned. It was, all in all, easier than waiting for them to obtain Utopia, or solving their problems for them.

One time, some survivors made it past his teeth, camping out in his mouth. They were awfully resilient, evading Unicron’s defense systems for so long that he decided he would let them live. Play with them. For he was lonely, and there was nothing better to do with his forever time.

Inside Unicron, these survivors had their needs met. When they needed fuel, he let them drink his life-blood (it was gruesome however, as often they were drinking the distilled remains of their home planets). When they needed to sleep, he created a canopy or their heads, or barring that, left building materials to construct tents. When they were bored, he would put visions in their heads. If they were lonely, he would appear to them as the kind of being they wanted to be with the most. In disguise, Unicron would accompany beings on journeys through his twisting insides. Many beings could spend a lifetime wandering Unicron’s caverns and lakes, and it would still not be enough to see everything.

Unicron aimed to create “paradise”, or his idea of it, inside his body. If he could not save everyone from a horrifying universe that made no sense, he would devour the universe and save a few beings to live in paradise.

A handful of survivors grew to hundreds, then thousands, as Unicron devoured more and more worlds, becoming a veritable Ark of robotic beings.

As the Destroyer, he was awfully sentimental, like someone picking up haggard stray animals off the street. If a being in trouble caught his eye, he would “adopt” them. He was especially found of caprine beastformers and jets. The first because they resembled him, and were often sacrificed to appease him. The second, well, that related to an ancient, ancient wound in Unicron’s spark.

These survivors explored Unicron’s insides, and found a perfect place to build a city. Millennia passed. Unicron watched over this place carefully, though often he was absent —sleeping or apathetic and numb. The maladies of age affected even a god.

Many things happened to bring us into the present day, but now we shall talk of these caprine beastformers:

Long ago, a mining world was “sacrificed” to appease him. The miners and their families? Goat-like mechs who were chosen due to their horned appearance, which harkened to Unicron. But he would welcome these goatbots into his body, and devoured the world that had sacrificed them anyways. He set aside a “fertile valley” where there could live in peace.

The miners built farming villages along the valley, and tried to rebuild their lives. Unicron, upon discovering they gave live birth and often died from it, taught them how to grow kids in rows in a farm plot. Still, some goatbots hung on to live birthing.

Being inexperienced with dealing with large groups of sentients, he had many ups and downs with these goatbots. He tried many different approaches to dealing with conflict and inequality in their society: micromanaging, mediating, or stepping back until he was sorely needed. He found that the villagers required a certain difficulty level to life to feel fulfilled, so he let them farm the valley, that was annually inundated by Unicron’s rivers. While they were aware that they lived in the body of a sentient being, they were unsure of his true appearance.

One of his favorite past-times was go from village to village in the form of a beautiful doe — golden-furred, with black facial stripes, a long golden beard and magnificent horns. He would mingle with the villagers and pretend he was an ordinary doe, instead of a planet-sized monster.

Like terrestrial goats, miner-settlers experienced breeding cycles. And it was always the case that there were bucks who were lucky in the game of love, and ones who lost. Some bucks mated with each other, while others were particular about getting with does.

Unicron, feeling towards these bucks as one would feel for a beloved pet, would arrive during the seasonal fertility festival and let these leftover bucks mate with him. And they adored Unicron, mounting this mysterious doe eagerly. Unicron loved the weight and warmth of these bucks on his back, and the trickle of transfluid into his avatar’s valve. He even had a few bitlets with these bucks.

The folklore of the miner-settlers evolved to include this mysterious doe who was perpetually in heat. New customs sprang up, concerning approaching this doe and encountering the offspring from god-mortal unions. It was reputed that Unicron’s moon was his child and would appear to Unicronians as a fat pygmy goat with a beard. For better or worse, their village life changed around Unicron, the land beneath their feet.

Other times, Unicron would appear as a goatbot doctor from the big city down the river. He would perform vaccinations from malware. He would check them for rust. He would assist with births. He would castrate bucks and does who wished to become eunuchs, secretly if their families would object.

Sadly, there were untimely deaths of goatbots, despite his best efforts. A doe would die in childbirth, or succumb to old age. Unicron felt a great sadness whenever a goatbot died, especially if they left behind orphans.

Unicron would, in his caprine disguise, nurse orphaned kids. Often, they had extended family who would care for them, but when family members were busy, the mysterious golden goat would be there.

The Energon flowing through Unicron’s circulatory system is reputed to be the best in the universe, second only to Primus’. Any mortal who tasted it would want to serve Unicron into eternity.

Unicron could take on any form he wished within the confines of his body. To a lucky few mechs, he would appear as a lactating doe with a swollen udder.

Bleating and rubbing against his chosen, he’d implore them to pet and milk him with their strong hands. They would discover that this creature had a soft, warm udder and excellent teats. The taste of its milk, which gushed out of its generous teats, was more heavenly than the most expensive high grade.

Unicron would brush his nose on the mech after a milking, hoping for a head pat. He would sit in their laps and chew cud. He would hope the lucky mech felt this was time well-spent.

 _What a peculiar creature!_ These mechs would think. _I don't suppose I've met any quite like this._ So on and so forth. In this way Unicron gave them memories to treasure.

Wherever these mechs came from, whatever harrowing experience they had prior to coming here, the golden goat and his enchanted realm were a small respite, an island in a stormy sea.

**Author's Note:**

> Credit to [Cyndi](http://archiveofourown.org/works/3628068/chapters/8011641) for the idea of a benevolent Unicron. My Unicron has a distressing idea of benevolence.
> 
> For those who like an interactive experience [xdeusxmachinax](xdeusxmachinax.tumblr.com) runs an RP blog based on the premise of Unicron having a city of libertines inside his chest cavity.


End file.
